


Incubator: John & Nick, Ohana

by heffermonkey



Series: The Incubator Verse [6]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Slavery, M/M, Marriage, Married Couple, Master/Slave, Parenthood, own universe, parenting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-23
Updated: 2014-10-11
Packaged: 2018-01-05 19:41:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1097851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heffermonkey/pseuds/heffermonkey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Continuing John and Nick's story as they experience the complexities of marriage, running a household of slaves and expanding their ohana.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"No," Nick said with a shake of his head.

"Nick," John moaned but Nick merely shrugged his shoulders and shook his head again.

"No baby," Nick told him. "Tell them you can't do it."

"They know I don't have plans this weekend," John pointed out.

Nick looked him sternly, "You're spending the weekend with your husband. That's a fucking plan John. Call them and inform them of that fact."

"It's overtime," John tried to argue.

"Which you don't need," Nick pointed out. "Surely there is someone else who is in need of the extra hours. Why aren't you calling them?"

"I think we need to discuss this," John started but Nick settled his hands on his shoulders and shook his head.

"No discussion John," Nick told him. "You aren't working this weekend. Now either call them or I will."

"Nicholas, you can't just,-." John started before pausing, Nick waiting him to finish his sentence with a questioning look.

"Can't just what John?" 

John shrugged his husbands hands off his shoulders and turned away with a wince of anger because Nick had every right, even if John disagreed.

"Nothing, I'll call them," John replied stalking away. 

Taking his phone of his pocket he went into the study and slammed the door shut as he speed dialled his office. It wasn't that he was bothered about not working, it was Nick's refusal to discuss it, the fact he had to accept that decision. It was rare Nick put his foot down in such a fashion or refused to at least talk something out before a decision was made. Call made he tossed his phone onto the desk and stood by the window he tried calming himself down, anger fizzing just below the surface. The door opened but he didn't turn, he wanted a few moments to himself but Nick was determined, as usual, to have it out there and then.

"John-," Nick said from the doorway.

"I've called them okay," John replied not turning. "I'm all yours this weekend."

"Well, I like to think of you as mine all of the time but thank you all the same," Nick replied sounding peeved at his behaviour.

"Yeah, all the time," John replied, not wanting to get into an argument but feeling his husband was being somewhat of an ass currently. "Just what you wanted."

"Fucking hell John," Nick spat out, his anger roused. "Forgive me for wanting us to spend a weekend together."

"It's not about the weekend Nick," John replied snappily. "It's about-."

"I know what its about John," Nick told him. "You shouldn't have said yes in the first place."

"Not without asking you, you mean," John huffed out through gritted teeth.

"John, please," Nick came to stand behind him, resting a hand on his shoulder. "Don't get bitter over this. I wouldn't mind any other weekend, but there was something I wanted to talk with you about."

John didn't turn, but Nick felt a little of the tension leaving his shoulders as he tried to appease him

"Yeah, okay," John replied still not happy with the situation. Nick gave a small knowing smile, John could be stubborn when it came to his bad moods.

"Look, I'm gonna go change," Nick told him, fingers delicately squeezing at the lingering tension in his husbands shoulders. "Then maybe we can go out tonight?"

"Fine," John replied, shoulders slumping under the caress of Nick's fingers.

"Come on, we can change together," Nick invited, stepping closer to drop a kiss into Johns dark blonde hair and sliding arms around him, squeezing encouragingly as he teased him, "Come help me pick out a shirt."

John gave a angry growl at that and shrugged off Nicks attempt at humouring him, pulling away from Nicks hold and turning to face him angrily.

"Fucking hell Nick, I'm not here to just pick out your fucking shirts. I may be a kept man now but don't treat me like I'm here to drop everything to serve you when you get home. I'm not another slave that you own."

Nick gave a shake of his head, realising John's mood was worse than he'd first considered. He was also piqued by the implications of John's words.

"That's not what I meant and you know it John," Nick retorted. "Don't make this out to be that kind if argument. If you're not happy with this marriage be a fucking man and tell me straight, but don't make every disagreement we get into seem like I'm throwing my weight around and treating you badly because I'm head of the household. You know what, forget about tonight, we'll stay in. Work the fucking weekend, because I really couldn't stand having you around me in this mood the next few days making me feel bad for wanting us to spend time together after a long fucking week of work."

John let out a angry sigh when Nick turned and left, the door slamming loud behind him. They both had reasons to be upset and he was still irritated by the situation. But he knew it was a petty argument even so and one that could have been avoided if he'd not lost his temper.

But Nick could be insensitive at times. His alpha personality that worked so well in the office could be suffocating at home, John knew Nick took his role as the head of the household seriously. But when he threw his weight around in such a manner John found part of him couldn't simply give in to his husbands demands. Nick had a tendency to keep things in the dark until last minute, he liked the thrill of the surprise. John was curious what he had had planned for the weekend but he had patience to wait. All Nick need have done was tell him earlier in the week that he had something planned instead of announcing it last minute.

Something concerned him more than their argument which would dissipate and pass as their tempers cooled. It was what Nick had said about him being unhappy in their marriage. John worried on those few words, wondering if that was the kind of impression he gave Nick on a regular occasion.

Leaving the study he made his way upstairs to the bedroom. Nick was showering in the en suite, clothes littering the bed and floor in a tangled mess, no doubt stripped off angrily in temper. John gave a small smile, a petulant Nick could be amusing in his own way. Gathering up the clothes John dumped them in the laundry basket by the door and picked out clean ones from the wardrobe for them both as he heard the shower turning off.

Nick stood at the door of the bathroom, towel wrapped low around his waist as he did so and John turned, gave a small smile of appreciation at the sight and hung the clothes on the wardrobe door.

"John," Nick started but John held a hand up to quieten him.

"No. I started the argument, it was petty and it shouldn't have ended the way it did. I'm sorry," John apologised.

"So am I," Nick replied. "I guess I need to learn to be more tactful when it comes to this kind of thing."

John shook his head again, "I don't need to know every detail Nick. But a heads up to tell me you have plans a few days in advance would help. Look I understand your position in this house, in this marriage, I respect it. And while we are on the subject you big idiot, I am not unhappy in this marriage. So don't assume I am merely because I lose it a bit with you. I'm perfectly capable at being pissed off at you and being happily married to you at the same time."

"Evidently," Nick said in agreement with a nod and a smile.

"Yeah well remember that before you start throwing around comments thinking I'm not," John scolded him.

"All right, I'm sorry," Nick apologised, "I shouldn't have said it. But hey, I'm allowed to say things in the heat of the moment when I'm pissed off at you. Fair's fair."

"Of course you are, I just want to make sure you don't start believing everything that comes out of that stupid mouth of yours in the heat of the moment," John pointed out with a small smile. "Don't expect me to just roll over every time you put your foot down Nick. I didn't marry into a dictatorship, even if you are the head of this household. I still have a voice in this relationship."

Nick rolled his eyes and approached him looking suitably chastened. Resting his hands on John's shoulders he gave a small sigh. "I'm sorry. Want me to keep saying it all night?"

"I didn't come up here to hear you grovel," John replied, giving him a soft poke in the ribs before his fingers splayed over Nick's defined abs and stomach.

"Thank fuck for that," Nick said, closing the small gap between them and pressing himself flush against his husband. "Because I can think of much better ways of showing my apologies."

"What kind of man do you think you married Nicholas Williams?" John teased, but didn't resist as Nick started pushing him back towards the bed. "Think I'm so easily won over by flirtatious advances?"

Nick gave a snort and shrugged his shoulders, pushing John down on to the bed as he pulled the towel off his own hips. "Worked on our first date. Think you'd have let me fuck you right there at the bar if I'd offered."

John tried to look offended but Nick was pulling himself over him, naked and hard, a dark predatory look in his eyes.

"I'm not that easy," John tried to argue but Nick merely grunted and pressed his mouth to John's neck.

"Yes you are," Nick smiled knowingly, already feeling John's resolve melting under his touch.

~


	2. Chapter 2

"So, where are we headed?" John asked as he pulled on his seatbelt. Nicholas had remained tight lipped and so far John hadn't asked.

"I thought we'd head up to North Point," Nick suggested with a small shrug.

John smiled, it was a favourite spot of theirs and it had been a while since they'd been. "Sounds great."

Nick hadn't mentioned anything more on what he wanted to talk about but John had learned to let him get it out in his own time. Whatever it was it was important and Nick was nervous about how John was going to react. They didn't talk much on the drive there and Nick parked up so they could hike the last few miles. They made small talk as they climbed up up to the plateau called 'North Point', a simple name for a place with a breathtaking view.

There was a bench there to sit down and enjoy the view and they settled down on it, Nick pulling John close. John let himself be manhandled, Nick had a habit of letting his possessive side show in such a manner but John never cared. It was a nice feeling to be wanted and have someone clearly showing their need and desires for you. It wasn't like he didn't feel the same way back and could be equally as possesive and jealous over his husband.

"Well?" John said as he rested a hand on Nick's knee. "You going to tell me what's on your mind? You've been quiet all afternoon."

"You're happy here right John?" NIck asked him carefully. "Living in Hawaii?"

"I love it here," John replied. 

It was true, he did. He hadn't known what it would be like to move from the city and it had taken time to adjust from living in a tiny apartment to a household full of people. But he loved the Island, the people, the way of life they had here. His job now was so much more fulfilling than he'd had in the city, he was more involved and was able to really see the difference he made in kids lives. That he could share it all with Nick made it all the more special.

"Why?" He asked, suddenly alarmed. He sat up and looked at Nick carefully. Maybe Nick didn't love it here as much as he assumed, maybe he wanted to go back to the city. John knew it would be a wrench, going back there. But Nick gave a smile and gave his shoulder a rub with his hand, snaking his arm around his neck. 

"Just making sure because of what I wanted to talk to you about," Nick started before trailing off. He paused and looked out over the scenery as John settled back against him. "I love it here too and I love being here with you and making a life together here. I know we've not been married long and we don't have to make any decisions straight away but I've been thinking maybe, maybe we could start thinking about starting a family here."

John smiled and sat up again to look at him. Nick looked nervous and John ran a hand over his cheek, pulling his face around so Nick was looking at him properly. "You mean kids?"

Nick gave a small nod of his head and John could have laughed. It was like the proposal all over again, Nick wearing every emotion he was feeling in the expressions of his face. He looked terrified about how John would react.

"Well, if I'm honest I've not given much thought to us starting a family," John replied gently. "But that's maybe because I've been getting used to a large household and married life. It is something I'd want to talk about definitely. I think you'd make a great father."

Nick looked surprised at that and screwed up his nose a little. "Really? I think you'd be the great dad and I'd be the one way out of my league. You're the one who's good with kids."

"Just because I work with them doesn't mean I'm dad material," John pointed out with an amused smile. "I think we'll both be a little out of our league but between us we may make some sort of success of it."

"So you'd be happy for us to start thinking about it, talking about it?" Nick asked him keenly. "I don't want to rush things so early on."

"Talking isn't rushing," John assured him. "But I'd like to start a family with you Nicholas, I want children. We've plenty of options to consider, some of them will take time depending on how you want to go about it. There's surrogacy, adoption or we could try and locate an Incubator on the markets though they aren't common. That would be a long shot."

John trailed off in thought, he knew where to get all the information, family structures had been an important part of his studies through college and universit.

"Or we could try the good old fashioned way," Nicholas mused aloud.

John smirked, "Well unless you're not telling me something baby I can safely say that is one option that won't be open to us."

He gave a small laugh before catching the slight guilt infused look on Nick's face, his body tensing as he avoided John's eye. John was taken aback and sat up a little straighter.

"Nicholas?" he questioned, confused.

"I may, perhaps, have failed to mention-," Nick started, squirming under John's intent gaze.

"Nicholas!" John exclaimed, giving him a soft poke. "You have got to be fucking kidding me."

"It's complicated John," Nick tried to explain himself, forcing himself to look at John and finding him staring at him with a shocked look on his features.

"You never said-," John began, shaking his head as if to clear his thoughts. "You can - you can have children?"

Nick gave a shrug of his shoulders like it was no big deal. "I have all the neccessary parts. I've been on a controlled preventative for it since I was seventeen years old, it's just not something I've ever talked about with people."

"I'm not fucking people Nicholas Williams," John retorted sternly. "I think this, **this** is a subject you bring up with the person you're planning on spending your life with, oh I dunno, some time in the early stages of the relationship."

"There was never a good time," Nick said, waving a hand in the air. "And would it really have made a difference if I'd told you last year or now?"

"No, but," John said, lying a hand on his husbands thigh. "This is just, it's a big secret Nick. It's a part of you that you've kept hidden from me."

Nick interlocked his fingers with John's, giving them a squeeze and looking at him with a sorry look on his face.

"I know, I'm sorry," Nick told him. "There were times I was going to tell you but then I figured what would be the point. We weren't talking about starting a family then and I didn't want you to feel pressured or feel like that was something I wanted when it wasn't. Not then."

John sighed and gave him a smile, leaning in against him again. "Any other big secrets I should know about?"

Nick shook his head firmly and looked suitably sorry enough to earn his forgiveness, receiving a chaste kiss on his forehead. John was more shocked than angry about it.

"So, natural conception huh?" John mused. "It's an option, but that's a big deal Nick. A really big decision to make, not just between the two of us, but for you personally. I wouldn't want you to feel - obligated."

"Giving you a child conceived naturally from the two of us wouldn't be an obligation baby," Nick assured him with a smile. "I think it would be a perfect way to start our family."

"You've been thinking about this a lot haven't you?" John said knowingly. Nick didn't expand on ideas until he'd explored all avenues to put them into action.

"John, I've known I could naturally conceive a child with another man since I was sixteen years old and my mother sat me down to give me the sex talk. To be honest I was glad of the prevetative option, because I didn't think I'd ever want children. The idea terrified me, plus I didn't think I'd ever get married, for a long time my life was my career. I go visit the doc twice a year for the prevent treatment, it's just part of my life now and well, I just didn't even think about it, I shut it away. Then I met you and yes, I love my job, but you make that and everything else pale in comparison. You are the only person who ever made me think about the idea of carrying a child."

~


	3. Chapter 3

It was going to take time. They had a few chats with their family doctor and John made sure both he and Nick did their homework on the idea of natural conception. He also made sure to remind Nick that carrying a child for nine months was going to change him, his body, his mental and emotional attitude, in ways he couldn't prepare for. He had to be sure Nick understood how it was going to affect his career, at least for a short time.

"We've waited this long, we can wait a while longer," John said as they relaxed on the couch one evening. "You need to see this merger through with your head screwed on right. And remember the doc said because you've been on meds all these years that your body will go through an adjustment period of a few months before we can even begin trying."

"I know but now that we're starting to talk about it and plan it," Nick smiled, resting his chin against John's head. "I just want to begin already."

"I know," John sighed, melting further against him. "We'll get there baby we will. Just be patient a little longer."

"John," Nick said after a comfotable pause of silence.

"Hmmm?" John said as he closed his eyes, feeling himself drifting into a gentle sleep.

"We haven't really talked about the actual, conception part," Nick started, feeling ridiculous as he even said the words.

"Huh?" John asked, not shifting and not really following what Nick was saying.

"You know, the physical aspect of actually making the baby," Nick said, giving John a soft poke.

John squirmed at the offending digit digging into his side and sat up a little with a frown.

"You talking about the sex?" John questioned, twisting to look up at Nick who looked a little nervous. "You okay about that?"

"Yeah, of course, it's just, well," Nick began, waving a hand around in his familiar way when he got nervous about something. "We've never, you know, you've not, we haven't-."

"Wow, we haven't have we," John said, sinking back against him with a grin. "Does that make you a dominant top or me a greedy bottom?"

"John, I'm serious," Nick said slightly irritated, giving John another poke.

"Hey, enough with the poking," John squirmed, sitting up to face him, taking in his serious expression and frowning. "Nick, you have, you know, bottomed, haven't you?"

"Fuck, yes, of course," Nick gasped in amusement, seriousness giving way to a grin at the absurdity of the conversation. "It's just that we've never-."

"You know I just always felt that was how it was between us," John said, squeezing Nick's leg. "I mean, I figured you'd give me a sign if you wanted to change things up and you never did, so I never suggested-."

"I'm certainly not complaining about my getting to fuck you every chance I get," Nick grinned greedily. "I'm just saying if we're going for a natural conception then it's something we need to talk about because it's never been part of our lives before."

"Not much to talk about," John shrugged, cuddling in once more. "Making love to you, however we do it, isn't going to be weird. It'll just be something new for us."

He felt Nick sigh and relax as he leaned in against him, an arm wrapping round to hug him gently. "Well, we may be putting this all off for a couple of months but we could get a little - practice - in," Nick said after a pause.

John laughed gently against him and twisted around in his arms so he could still lay against him and see him at the same time. He reached up a hand and ran his fingers over Nick's jaw and neck.

"Are you nervous about that?" John asked him carefully. He got the sense Nick was and he could understand.

"A little," Nick admitted. "I have no idea why."

"Well, like you say, it'll be different for us. And considering how long we've been together, it's been a while for you," John thought out, caressing his husbands face as Nick looked down at him.

"It's not just that John," Nick sighed with a frown. "There's something so - gods this is going to sound terrible, please don't hate me for it."

John smiled up at him and leaned in closer, making Nick hold him tighter in his arms. "Talk to me baby."

"I'm an old fashioned kind of guy John, you know that. I'm the romantic who likes to sweep people off their feet. I'm a traditionalist who opts for a marriage instead of a blessing ceremony. I'm the head of the household and I take on every responsibility of that role."

"Nicholas," John sighed against him. "This isn't going to diminish any of your pride or standing in the Household. You're my husband and I'm yours which means sometimes you're going to need from me as much as I need from you. Just because you're the head of the household doesn't mean you can't feel vulnerable or unsure about things. I have as much responsibility to care for you as you feel you do for me. But this is why I need you to really think about and consider carrying a child for us. Because it's going to change you mentally and emotionally in ways you aren't prepared for."

"I know, I know," Nick nodded absently. "But there's only so much I can do to prepare myself. I don't know 'how much' this is going to change me and that's what unnerves me the most baby."

"You know we don't have to do this, no matter how much you want to or feel you need to," John assured him. "There are other ways. I'm not expecting anything. I just want us to start a family when the time is right and I'll be happy however that comes about."

"No, I want this. Despite everything I want to give you, us, a baby," Nick said, looking down at him with a determined expression. "I've never felt this strongly before about this. It was always something I hid about myself, being able to conceive. I was pretty much on the meds from the start. I did a little research when I was about eighteen just out of curiosity and that freaked me out even more. So I just buried it away, ignored that part of me and nobody ever needed to know. In fact you're the only person who knows in Hawaii, which means they are gonna have a hell of a shock at the office when I get to tell them I'm pregnant and taking the full year of paternity leave I'm entitled too once the baby is here."

John gave a small laugh and pressed into him further, feeling Nick's arms cradling him firmly.

"So, practice huh?" John mused with a small smile. "That will be fun."

Nick still looked aprehensive but gave a smile and slight nod of his head.

"Nick, we don't have too until you're ready," John assured him.

"It's ridiculous," Nick shrugged with slight frustration. "Like you say, it shouldn't matter how we make love."

"Have you had some bad experiences?" John asked him.

"Nothing terrible," Nick shook his head, looking down at him again. "But nothing mind blowing neither."

"I can do mind blowing," John grinned. "It may be new for us but I think I'm pretty confident in knowing how to leave you satisfied."

"I'm never satisfied with you," Nick retorted, pulling him up to press a kiss to his lips. "You always leave me hungry for more."

"That is because you, husband, are greedy," John pointed out between kisses, laughing at Nick's possessiveness as he tried, weakly, to resist his tightening hold.

"Can't help it," Nick smiled, wondering as he often did, what he'd done to deserve such happiness and contentment that John brought into his life. "From the moment I saw you I developed this insatiable need for you."

"Must have been contagious because ever since we met I couldn't put you out of my mind," John replied, laughing again as Nick kissed him, longer this time, soft and tender. "I love you."

"Love you more," Nick retorted, mouth brushing against his.

"Impossible," John smiled, fingers caressing the back of Nick's neck.

"Do so," Nick teased, a heavier kiss this time, one that left John breathless and melting against his body.

"Prove it," John challenged with a teasing glint in his eye.

Nick pulled back, challenge accepted and a thrum of anticipation ran through both their bodies. They'd talk more later on the physical changes their sex life would be undergoing but tonight, he'd make sure his husband understood with every inch of his being how much he loved him.


	4. Chapter 4

It was months later when Nick's medication was changed. They worked closely with a specialist who explained in detail and at length about all possible changes. She also warned that it was going to take time and not to get their hopes too high for an early result. And there was a possibility that because he'd been on the medication for so long, that his body wouldn't adjust. John found himself more wary of this warning than Nick. The specialist gave Nick new medications to kick start his hormones but the first few months were difficult as nothing seemed to change and Nick was becoming frustrated over that fact.

His temper thinned, which began to worry John. He knew Nick had a temper and a sharp tongue but it seemed to emerge more often in the weeks after they began the process of starting a family. It wasn't towards himself that Nick turned his temper, but the slaves and a day didn't go by John found himself trying to soothe a situation within the house. Over time the house became a more subdued atmosphere as the slaves became more anxious over pleasing their Master.

John arrived home one day to a silent house. He frowned, usually it was a hub of activity, if slaves had performed their duties for the day they still wandered the house with their personal activities. John had encouraged a home where they involved themselves with creative activities as well as their duties. Usually Laka was waiting for him to come home and they'd sit talking about the day together as he relaxed from a long day of work. But nobody was around and he wandered through the slave quarters of the house calling out names, but nobody heeded him.

Reaching Laka's room he found the door locked. Concerned, John used his master key to unlock the door, finding Laka inside, sitting on his bed reading, looking warily at him from his position.

"What's going on Laka?" John asked, closing the door behind him. "I was calling for everyone, why didn't you answer?"

"I'm sorry but Master Nick said we weren't to leave our quarters," Laka replied, standing and looking apologetic.

"He's sent all the slaves to their rooms?" John asked, concerned. "A lockdown?"

"He arrived home early," Laka shrugged, biting his lower lip, unsure how much he should be saying. "We'd finished our duties today so Oliver said we could enjoy some time out on the beach before we prepared for supper. But when he found us he lost his temper-."

Before he could continue the door swung open, Nick stood in the doorway and Laka fell silent, dropping his gaze when Nick looked at him with an accusing eye.

"I thought I heard you come in," Nick said, turning to John. "All the slaves are on lockdown."

"All of them?" John asked in surprise. "Nicholas - you put them all on lockdown? Why?"

"We'll discuss this in private," Nick said, standing to one side expecting John to follow him from the room.

"No we'll discuss this now," John replied with a shake of his head. He'd had a long day at work and didn't need this added stress. "Laka says all they were doing was relaxing on the beach."

"An activity you've encouraged," Nick snapped back at him. "I'll not discuss this further in front of a slave."

"You'd rather they sit around twiddling their thumbs after they've finished their duties?" John said, equally as snappy. His own temper was wearing thin at Nick's recent behaviour.

"If they haven't enough to do, more will be found for them," Nick said, looking at Laka again who shifted warily from one foot to another. "Or, we can send some back to the markets, which will provide ample enough work for the others to be kept busy. What do you think about that Laka?"

"Nick, you're being unreasonable," John told him.

"No, I'm being practical," Nick said, drawing closer to him. "You've coddled them all John, allowed them to shirk in their duties and responsibilities. They are here to serve us, to run this house. How long has this been going on? Have you always allowed this kind of behaviour? I've never interferred with how you allow Laka some free reign but I won't let you do it with the others also. This is my household and things are going to change."

"What the fuck is that meant to mean, I've allowed Laka free reign?" John said, squaring up to his husband now. "And I haven't 'coddled' any of them, I've just allowed them to have a little happiness in their lives. If it were up to you they'd be bowing and cowtowing to remind you who you are, their Master, their owner. Fuck Nicholas, why not lets go back to the old days, shackle them up with chains, whip them every day for not polishing the mantle correctly? Fucking hell, they were having a moment of enjoyment on the beach."

"Yes well if it were your household you'd allow that more often than having them actually carry out what they are here for," Nick yelled back at him. "But then you don't have any idea what a real household is like do you John. You moved around so much you never lived in a decent one, you never experienced what a real household was like growing up. You make it up as you go along, you live in a fantasy world where Master and slave can live together as equals. You think because you made a laughable attempt at it when you bought Laka that makes you an expert on how to run a household? You have no fucking clue, it's embarassing. You're turning this Household into a fucking joke and it's going to stop before we become the laughing stock of our friends. What kind of parent are you going to be if this is the example you set?"

Nick felt a coldness run over him even as he said it. It was like he wasn't inside himself but watching from a distance. Even as he said the words he regretted them, an alarm bell going off in his brain telling him to shut the fuck up. But it was as if he couldn't stop himself, and the weird thing was he didn't even mean what he was saying, he just knew the words would sting deep. He knew the easiest way to hurt John was bring up the differences in their upbrinings, himself from a stable family and John from a childhood of foster care. John was staring at him, open mouthed, shock and hurt in his eyes.

"I can't believe you just said that," John said, voice low, like it was a struggle to talk. Nick could see him holding back tears. "Gods, I love you Nicholas but fuck, you can be such a fucking hurtful, arrogant - asshole."

John pushed past him roughly and out of the door. Nick just stood swaying, unsure what to do or say. He glanced around and found Laka looking at the empty space John had stood before lifting his eyes up to look at Nick. There was hurt in his eyes too and Nick felt another pang of regret. A few moments later he heard a door slam, their bedroom upstairs. He knew he needed to go to his husband, take back what he'd said but he knew a quick apology wouldn't be enough. Turning he took hold of the door handle to pull it closed behind him, unable to face Laka's expression, but he paused as he left.

"I'm sorry Laka," he said quietly, staring down at his fingers on the door handle. "I didn't mean what I said about selling any of you."

"I'm sorry we've dissapointed you Sir," Laka replied in soft reply. "The last thing any of us wish to do is let you down or embarass you."

Nicholas had to let out a laugh, a hollow mocking laugh at himself for making such accusations. He looked over at Laka who hadn't moved, still carefully watching him from across the room.

"None of you have let me down Laka," Nick assured him. "The only person embarassed here is myself and my recent behaviour. I'm afraid I'm letting everyone down at the moment."

"No Sir," Laka told him with a small shake of his head. "You're just trying to adjust to changes. We all know how that feels, perhaps some of the other slaves more than myself."

Nick looked at him in surprise, admitting to himself that his behaviour recently had been erratic what with different medications, trying to mentally get his thoughts into gear about trying for a baby when the time was right. He knew he was frustrated with some of the things he was feeling, his emotions seemed to change with the tide, physically he felt tired some days morning, noon and night and on others as if he had all the energy in the world. He thought he'd prepared himself for the changes but he was finding he'd under estimated how the entire situation would make him feel and think. But Laka was right, slaves adjusted all the time, over the course of many slaves lives they had to adjust to several different households and new Owners. And they did it with a silent, dutiful acceptance without choice or voice in the matter.

"Perhaps you should go and talk to John," Nick suggested on a sudden whim. "I'm not sure he'll want to see me in a hurry after what I said."

"I think perhaps it would be best if I stay here and you speak to him when you think you're ready to Sir," Laka replied with a gentle shake of his head. "It isn't my place."

Nicholas held back from ordering Laka upstairs to his husband. It would be so easy to send him to comfort John and calm the situation and he knew Laka would be the shoulder John needed to lean on. But it wasn't the right thing to do and both of them knew it. Instead he mutely nodded his head and left him, head too full of worries, stomach churned up in knots over what he'd said to John. Wearily he walked along the hall, the house was too quiet with everyone banished to their rooms and he hated the silence. An atmosphere, thick with tension and depressing quiet had settled and he rubbed a hand through his hair nervously before going into Oliver's room. Oliver was the head slave in the house and one Nick had brought with him from the city when they had moved. The slave got to his feet when he entered, looking fearful, as if he was there to punish him. Nicholas realised in the entire time they'd been in Hawaii, he'd not had to even threaten a hazing to any of the slaves and that, in a lot of ways, was because of the household John had created for them both in his time spent at home when Nick worked long hours of work.

"Lockdown's over," Nick told him quickly. "Have everyone return to their duties, begin preparing for supper."

"Yes Sir," Oliver replied with a quick nod.

Nick turned to leave before pausing, looking back at him in thought.

"And have the table set for everyone," He added, "We'll all eat together tonight."

John had tried to persuade him when they'd moved to Hawaii to eat together as a group, but it was something he'd never done before they were together and he'd put his foot down that meals would be kept seperate. It was how he'd been brought up and a rule he'd always imposed before he'd been married. He'd always found it a strange, foreign concept to sit at the table with a slave.

Nick made his way to the front hall, eyeing the stairs and wondering how long to wait before he went to speak to John. The longer he waited, the more awkward it would be but he wasn't sure John would speak to him right now either. Sucking up some courage he made his way upstairs to at least test the lay of the land, he knew he was on shaky ground at the moment. Warily he opened the bedroom door, ready for any missiles John may choose to throw at him, he'd deserve every one, but nothing flew by his head. John sat on the bed with his back to him, head in his hands and he remained still as he stepped inside.

"John," Nick said carefully, steeling himself for a barrage of words.

John didn't move or acknowledge him as he walked to the bed, staying on his own side, nervous about getting too close.

"John?" Nick repeated, he'd prefer words to the silent treatment. He couldn't deal with silences, that gave him nothing to fight against.

"I just want some time alone," John said after another moments silence.

"Okay," Nick sighed with a nod, even if John couldn't see him. "I just - I'm sorry, about what I said before. I didn't mean it, any of it."

"Yes you did," John replied quietly. "You may be sorry for saying it, but you meant every word Nicholas. You knew exactly how to hurt me."

"John, please," Nick tried but John sat up straighter, setting his hands on his knees.

"I said I wanted to be alone," John said firmly, before he hunched his shoulders a little. Nick suspected a tremble in them, heard the tightness in John's voice holding back tears.

"The slaves are preparing supper," Nick informed him, drawing away from the bed. He felt guilty and helpless and all he wanted was to hold his husband and take back every word he'd carelessly thrown at him in spite.

"All right," John nodded his head. “I'll be down to eat.”

Nick hovered, caught between doing as John asked or going to him in hopes of forgiveness, but John still didn't move and Nick knew to give him his space. He left the room, heart still heavy with regret.

He escaped away into the den to be alone himself, mind whirring with what had happened, from his losing his temper when he arrived home to how he'd spoken to John and what he had said. It frightened him that he couldn't control his temper at times, that he could be so cutting and harsh with his words. John was right, he'd meant what he said because it was things he'd used to think about John's skewed view of how to run a household. John didn't come from a solid family unit, he'd grown up within the system, sent from family to family or social community to community until he'd been old enough to go to college. Buying and living with Laka hadn't given him much experience to draw from, especially with their strange relationship. 

Yet there in Hawaii, though Nick had set the rules, John had somehow made things less strict. He'd made it a home. The slaves were happier Nick noticed. They were more at ease around the both of them, John could always be found to be having long conversations with them, involving them with their lives. Nick knew they were all the better because of it, even if he'd tried to resist it on some levels. Perhaps his own upbringing had made him too hard and harsh in his view of a slaves position in his life.

He tried reading to take his mind off things when there was a tap on the door and Mya entered.

"Supper is ready Sir," She informed him quietly.

"Thank you Mya," He replied, setting his book aside and standing. "Can you tell John please."

"He already knows Sir," she informed him. "He came down a few minutes ago."

"Oh," Nick said, crossing the room. He felt nervous tension thrum through his body as they made their way to the dining room, where everything had been laid out to help themselves, people already sitting, waiting for him to arrive. 

John was already sat in his usual seat, Laka sat opposite him, giving him quick glances to make sure he was okay. Nick felt eyes on him from every direction from everyone as he took his seat at the head of the table by John. Nick really hoped he didn't have to prompt everyone into eating because that would be unbearable and it was already weird for him to sit with the slaves for a meal. There was a long pause until John cut in before it got awkward.

"Laka, pass the salad please," He said over the table and Laka smiled, picking up the bowl and handing it over.

Nick blinked out of his awkwardness as everyone launched into action, bowls passed around as a soft chattering began, different foods being asked for as they helped themselves. Nick himself kept quiet, still not sure where he and John currently stood. John amicably chatted away to the slaves as he asked about their day and Nick found himself learning that each of his slaves had their own 'hobby' that John had encouraged them to explore . Laka sketched, Mya enjoyed helping out in the garden. Daphne was reading a poetry book that John had given her from their collection.

"Do you prefer poetry or novels?" Nick found himself asking, seeing a blush cross her cheeks as he addressed her.

"I just like reading Sir," she shrugged with slight embarassment. "I don't always understand all the words."

Nick wasn't surprised, a slave was given minimal education in the training camps.

"Well, next time you don't understand something you could come and tell me," Nick smiled over at her. "I'll try and explain it to you. I think I have an old dictionary from college in the den, you should use that too. Every time you find a word you don't understand you just look it up. It will help you understand better, especially with poetry."

"Thank you Sir," she replied quickly, ducking her head down with a wide smile on her face.

Nick felt a hand settle over his where it lay on the table and looked down, John's fingers curling into his as he gave a squeeze. Nick looked over at him and John gave him a small smile before drawing Laka into conversation.

As the meal drew to a close Nick found himself warming greatly to the idea of sitting with the slaves to eat. He found that throughout just one meal he'd learned more about them than he had living with them all the time they'd been in Hawaii. Before they began clearing away the dishes he had everyone stay at their seats.

"I just want to apologise for this afternoon," He said, seeing nervous, awkward looks in his slaves faces. He felt strange himself, he was a proud man and apologising to slaves had always been beneath him. "I know I'm a strict Master, I expect high standards from you all because I know you're capable of reaching those standards. When I punish you, it should be because I feel you've let me, John and the household down, not because I'm so close minded that I can't see how you all having a moment to enjoy yourselves is good for us as a Household. My behaviour recently has been letting you all down and I'm sorry for that, because if I'm expecting high standards from you, then I should be of a high standard as your Master and I'm not being that for you."

Nobody replied, all looking nervously at one another or down at their hands. Slaves in general didn't feel comfortable hearing apologies from their Masters because it was a strange concept. Usually it was the slave apologising and hoping for mercy, not the other way around. John gave Laka a nod of his head and Laka got up, beginning to clear away the dishes silently, the others following. Nick looked to John with a slight twist of his mouth but John gave a small shake of his head and waited for the room to clear before he spoke.

"Well, someones riding the emotional rollercoaster today," John said grimly to him. Nick could still sense tension between them, despite the fact John had been holding his hand to assure him throughout the meal. "Why this sudden need to eat altogether?"

"I needed to make up for today," Nick shrugged nervously. "To you all."

"So this was just a one off 'I'm sorry' meal?" John asked, sitting back in his chair.

"No," Nick shook his head, "I'm just, I'm trying here John."

John gave a small laugh, rubbing a hand over his face as he shook his head. Nick looked miserably at him, wondering just how fucked up he'd made things between them. John looked at him curiously, seeming to understand his frustration as he leaned forward and took his hand again.

"I know you are," He replied. "You know, I've been telling you for months now how this trying for a baby is going to change you in ways you aren't prepared for. I just didn't think I'd have to prepare for it too. Fuck Nick, what you said this afternoon, that really hurt. I forget how sharp and cutting that tongue of yours can be. Then you turn around and do this, show your slaves that softer side of you you like to keep hidden. You know, it's okay to be a caring Master sometimes. It helps them trust you if they feel they can talk to you as they have tonight."

"Gods John I'm sorry for what I said," Nick told him, holding his hand desperately. "It was like I was telling myself not to say it but I couldn't. I knew it would hurt you and I wanted it too. But I didn't mean it baby, not now. I may have thought like that once, but I don't now, I really don't. I think you've made this Household into something special. If I'd had my way then the dividing line would have been so strict and it would be a much quieter, duller house to live in. I shouldn't have said what I said, I am sorry baby."

"I know," John nodded, but he still looked glumly at him.

"You do believe me?" Nick asked, fearing the worse. He felt alarmed at the desperation he needed for the assurance of John's belief.

"Yes, of course I do," John replied, giving his fingers a squeeze again. "But that doesn't mean what you said doesn't hurt any more."

Nick sighed heavily and sank back on his seat, shaking his head. "I don't know what came over me today. I couldn't concentrate at work so I came home early, when I found everyone sitting outside I just flipped. I know I have a temper but I've never felt rage like it before John, it makes me nervous. What if, when we have a baby, I lose it with them? Fuck I'm going to be a terrible father."

"Nicholas stop," John admonished gently. "You are going to be a great father."

Nick shook his head miserably, it had been something worrying him lately, being a parent. He doubted he was going to do a good job. His slaves didn't trust him so why would a child?

"No, I'm not. I have a temper, I have too high expectations. I'm a stict man and I don't like having to adapt to changes I didn't set in place. I don't even know what goes on in my own household. I didn't know my own slaves did things they simply enjoy, like drawing or reading poetry. And if I can hurt you the way I did today, how easy will it be to do that to a child who can't defend themselves when I lose my temper? Perhaps this whole starting a family is a bad idea, perhaps we should wait a while."

He felt a hand brush over his cheek gently, cupping his face as John pulled him to face him, giving him a soft smile.

"Every parent worries that they are going to fail," John told him gently. "Don't you think I worry about that too? I didn't have parents, so I have nothing to draw from. I'm afraid I'll encourage the wrong morals in them, or that I won't bond with them as a normal parent because I've no idea what it feels like to be a son to anyone so how can I create a parental bond with a child? It's okay to have worries Nick. You're on the emotional rollercoaster right now, your body is going through changes. If you really feel we need too, then we'll speak to the Doc, have you put back on the repressent medication but I think we are ready. You just need to trust that everything will be okay."

"I'm sorry, I can't think straight lately," Nick replied dejectedly. He was tired, emotionally spent and he felt drained after the day.

"I think you should take some time off work," John told him. "Just a few days, spend some time at home, have some rest and adjust to how you are feeling now."

"You think it would help?" Nick questioned, uncertain. He hated not being so sure of himself but John nodded his head firmly with a smile.

"Yes, I think it would," John replied.


	5. Chapter 5

John received a call from Laka when he was at work.

"I think you should come home John," Laka said, sounding worried. "It's Master Nick."

"Is he okay?" John said, grabbing his suit jacket.

"He said he wasn't feeling all that well this morning and when I went to check on him just now he was writhing in agony and not making much sense when I tried to talk to him. Should we call an ambulance?"

John's mind whirred over what Laka told him, thinking over everything the specialist had informed him. They knew this stage was coming, they just didn't know when.

"No, I'm coming home right now," John replied. "Keep everyone out of the bedroom, including yourself Laka. Send Mya to keep an eye on him if you must."

He didn't live far from his office and was home within ten minutes, barely parking the car in the drive before he ran into the house. Laka was waiting in the hall for him, the other slaves lingering in wait, worry on their faces.

"John?" Laka said with concern, taking his jacket. 

"It's all right," John told him, squeezing his hand. "I've spoken to the Doctor, I'm going to go see him and contact her with his symptoms but I think we both suspect this is simply Nick's body beginning to get ready for a baby."

He left him and made his way upstairs, hearing a muffled groan from the bedroom. Opening the door he found Nick on the bed, curled up into himself, pale and sweating. Mya looked terrified as she held a cool flannel to his forehead.

"John," Nick managed to gasp out and John went to him, dismissing Mya with a gentle smile.

"It's okay Mya, I'll take over," John told her and she quickly escaped the room. John sat by the bed, rubbing a hand over Nick's back.

"Okay baby," John soothed him, "Talk to me. What's happening?"

"Started feeling sick this morning," Nick said through gritted teeth, not shifting. "Then started feeling these weird aches, they got worse and worse and now it just feels like everything is getting twisted around inside. Fuck John, I think this is it."

"Yeah, I know baby," John told him, taking out his cell and speed dialling the specialist. He explained the symptoms over the phone, trying to soothe his husband as best he could with his hand, sitting close. Nick didn't move, just stayed coiled on the bed, grunting and moaning every now and then as John spoke on the phone. Finally he disconnected and set his cell by the bed.

"Well, she suspects it's the begining of the harvest mode," John confirmed. "We just need to wait."

"Fucking wait for what?" Nick groaned against the pillows.

"For it to pass," John said, leaning over and rubbing his back again. "It should be over soon."

"Easy for you to fucking say," Nick snapped in reply. "You're not the one whose fucking insides are being rearranged."

John hid a smile at Nick temper, glad it hadn't waned any in his plight. He allowed his husband the right to be in a foul mood over what was happening. He doubted he'd be any happier if he were suffering as Nick evidently was. It was difficult to sit back as he tried to get comfortable, accepting what was happening to his body, trying to breath through it. Eventually his groans subsided and he began to be less tense, unfurling on the bed slowly. John ran fingers over his face gently.

"Feeling any better?" John asked him.

"No," Nick said with a scowl. "But it doesn't ache as much."

"I'll get you some water," John said, standing up but Nick grabbed him by the hand, pulling him back down to the bed.

"No, stay a while longer," he said, holding onto his hand tight. John realised how vulnerable he was feeling and patted his hand gently. 

"It's all right Nick, I'm not going anywhere. Just the bathroom okay?" John assured him.

Nick let him go but followed with his eyes and John returned quickly with a glass of water, helping him sit up and drink. Nick was sheened with sweat, hair slick and he looked exhausted.

"You okay? Pain subsiding?" John asked him.

"Yeah, yeah," Nick nodded, laying back down on his side, still curled up a little. "Gods baby this feels fucking weird."

John just nodded grimly. He couldn't say 'I know' because he had no idea what his husband was going through.

"Guess I should book a few days off work myself," John mused with a soft smile. 

The doctor had advised them to be together as much as possible once the harvest process began. And no other males were to be in the direct vicinity because of the nature of the mating process. They'd already spoken extensively with the slaves and they all understood the circumstances. For the next few days at least, only the female slaves would be in contact with Nicholas.

The rest of the afternoon was uneventful. Nicholas fell into a deep sleep and John left him to rest, assuring the slaves that Nick was going to be okay when he found them all sitting around anxious. He sent them back to their chores to keep them busy and checked on Nick periodically throughout the afternoon. He slept for a few hours before waking, refreshed but still feeling a little off. He took a shower which seemed to revive him and ate some food that Mya brought up to the room.

It was evening and the slaves had retired at their curfew. Usually John and Nick would sit up talking over their day and making plans but John wandered through the house alone, checking it was secure for the night before retiring early to bed himself. The room was bathed in darkness and he guessed Nick had gone back to sleep. He used the bathroom and was stripping down when he heard Nick stir on the bed, looking over to see him rolling over, propping up onto an elbow as he looked at him.

"How you feeling baby?" John asked with a smile as he lay his clothes over the easy chair of the room.

"Much better," Nick replied with a smile, glancing at the clock. "Still early, didn't you want to stay up?"

"Not alone," John shook his head. "Much rather be up here with you."

He went to the bed, sliding under the covers and spooning up behind his husband. Nick relaxed back against him with a satisfied sigh.

John was happy when he woke the next morning after a fitful sleep and Nick still resting in his arms. John took a close look at him and smiled at the ease that had settled into his features. Dipping his head down he pressed a kiss to his shoulder and left him to his sleep as he went to the bathroom and showered. As he towelled down and brushed his teeth he looked at himself in the mirror and wondered how long it would take before the next phase of the harvesting. They both understood what would occur but it still unnerved him that they didn't know when it would happen or how often.

"Hey, I thought you'd fallen down the plug hole or something," Nick teased as he appeared at the doorway.

John rinsed out his mouth and grinned over to him. "I haven't been in here that long."

Nick pinched his ass before going to turn on the shower before turning to the toilet to take a leak. John left him to it to go and get dressed.

"You want me to get Mya to bring you up some breakfast?" John asked as he pulled on a t-shirt and wandered back to the bathroom where Nick was emerging from the shower, grabbing a towel.

"Yeah, please," Nick nodded. "Just something light."

John turned to leave as Nick rubbed the towel firmly over his chest. John felt his mouth dry up and his cock stir at the motion. His heart beat harder in his chest and suddenly his blood felt like fire in his veins.

"John?" Nick questioned, wondering why he was staring.

John couldn't think or breathe, all he could focus on was Nick, naked and right there. He needed to hold him, touch him and taste him. Without pause he propelled himself forward, hands smoothing over Nick's firm frame, mouth greedily covering his as he swallowed down Nick's gasp of surprise. The kiss was demanding, John devouring Nick's breath's and sounds as he undid his pants, his cock suddenly hard and throbbing. 

"Need to fuck you," John growled possessively, pulling away to push at Nick until he turned towards the sink, shoving him forward. He couldn't think straight, all he could think was burying himself deep into his lover. The sight of Nick made his cock twitch in anticipation, his naked back to him, strained from the angle, legs apart and toned ass ready to be parted so he could bury himself into him.

Through the haze of lust he unscrewed the lid off a tube of lube, shaky fingers twisting into Nick without much warning. The sound of Nick's surprise made him spear them hard, the feel of tightness making him growl in need. No time for much prep, he needed to fuck him, now, and he wiped the excess grease onto his dick before he grabbed at Nick's hips, lining himself up. He couldn't wait any longer, pushing into him, listening to Nick's shaky moan and growling in his throat. Fuck it felt so good, cock wrapped in heat and tightness and perfection. He pushed in balls deep, wrapped his arms around his husband and began rutting into him, chasing the pleasure that danced just beyond his reach. Nick pushed back into him, sounding deliciously dirty as he was fucked, John sucked in deep, hard breaths as he pounded him.

Brightness seemed to dot in his eyes and he squeezed them tight, sucking in breaths with each snap of his hips until everything exploded in white light, hips snapping forward and trying to bury his cock deep into his partner. His cock throbbed and twitched as it emptied his seed deep within his lover, it seemed to shoot out of him over and over until he was spent.

As he fell from his high he settled down onto his feet, sliding out of his lover, gentling his touches and leaning against him for support, feeling as if his knees were about to give out. They stood together, steadying their breaths and John's thoughts began to clear.

"Fuck baby," Nick said after a moment, giving a shaky laugh.

John nodded against him, forehead sticky with sweat. He held him softly, giving him a squeeze, aware of the roughness and quickness of the act. The doctors had warned them about that fact. "You okay?"

"Yeah, yeah," Nick assured him. "You need to get the plug. It's in the top drawer of the dresser."

John reluctantly pulled away, tucking himself away into his pants and zipping up as he retrieved the plug which would keep his come in his lover. They'd been warned it could take several tries before they were successful, but it was procedure to use the plug until a seed took. He went back to Nick who'd not moved from the sink and pressed the plug into him gently. Nick gave a shaky breath before he relaxed, stepping back from the sink as John put an arm around him.

"Sure you're okay, that was pretty intense," he asked, looking up at him searchingly.

Nick smiled and turned to him, putting an arm around his neck. "Yeah, it was, but it felt fucking amazing as well baby. Only weird thing was not getting off myself, didn't even get hard."

The specialist had warned them about that also. It was all part of the mating process and John smiled, sliding his free hand down Nick's torso.

"Could make it up to you," he smiled teasingly up at him.

"Well, I am planning on carrying a baby for us for nine months," Nick smirked. "I guess it's the least you could do."


	6. Chapter 6

Over the next five days the mating process occurred with similar quickness, each time John was suddenly bombarded with a surge of lust to fuck his husband. Each time Nick made the delicious, mewling, moaning, desperate sounds that spurred him on and even though it was rough and intense, John felt like it was the best sex of his life. It was also exhausting and between the moments of passion, he could see how it played on Nick's mind that it was taking time for something to click, for a seed to be created and begin incubation.

On the sixth day, John had woken in the night, sheened in sweat, like his passion was already firing up despite that he'd barely opened his eyes. He woke Nick up as he was prepping his hole and Nick barely had a moment to realize what was happening before John pushed into his body. It was quick and rough and John growled and fucked hard, like his entire being needed to crawl into Nick and possess him. They collapsed in a tangle of limbs afterwards and John folded Nick into his arms as bliss left him feeling wasted. Somehow they drifted into sleep as quickly as it had happened.

It wasn't until mid-day that sixth day that either of them realized John hadn't felt the urge to mate. They felt cautious mentioning it and aside from a short comment or two they stayed quiet. Neither of them wanted to jinx the process, but they were secretly hoping it was a good sign. For the time being, as they went through the process, they were spending time alone around the house to save any awkward moments with the male slaves particularly. There'd been a few occurrences when John had fucked Nick in the dining room, in the den and against the wall in the hall. Afterwards they'd laughed about it, noticing the lack of slaves wandering in the house. They'd known it was something that would probably happen, but they tried to save their slaves from too much embarrassment so they had been eating alone again for the time being.

John had found he'd been more watchful of Nick, like a protective streak had suddenly developed. So he was watching him as he ate, noticing Nick kept frowning and pausing, as if thinking to himself. John frowned also and leaned in, catching his eye.

"Something wrong?" he asked, reaching over to rest a hand over Nick's where it rested on the table.

"I don't know," Nick said with a small shrug. "I just feel - different. Like something is different. I can't quite explain it."

"You mean you feel physically different?" John asked to clarify.

"Yeah," Nick nodded, sitting back with a satisfied, calm sigh. "Yeah I feel different, in a good way."

"You think -?" John questioned, not tempting fate to say it out loud.

"I think we should go make an appointment to see our family doctor," Nick smiled with a nod.

~

Nicholas hadn't known just how much pregnancy would change him. Everything in his life, from how he thought, how he acted, to what he was capable of doing was turned upside down within weeks of discovering he was incubating. In the months before many people, John specially had been warning him about change, but until it hit, he just hadn't realized how good it was for him.

He'd always been a man needing to be in control. Growing up he'd been independent, had known as he went through school, college and university that he wanted to be successful and eventually run his own company or at the very least be an important part of a business. Love, marriage and children hadn't really factored into his future ambitions until John had stumbled into his life. He'd always brushed off silly notions of 'love at first sight' and knowing in the blink of a moment when you'd met the person you'd spent the rest of your life with. But meeting John he'd felt something, only it took a while for him to get a clue because he was too focused on his future to see what was standing right there in front of him.

He knew he was the luckiest guy in the world that John gave him a second chance. That despite his many flaws, and John lit up every one of them, John had wanted him. He'd still needed the control though, it was just his way, part of his being, he'd been brought up in an old fashioned household and he knew, under pressure and stressful situations, that kind of .life withstood everything that was thrown at you. That John loved him enough and trusted him enough to enter that kind of marriage was something he treasured as a gift every day.

But John also showed him that he didn't need to be so strict and rule abiding all of the time. He'd grown up in a house where the rules were rigid, Master and slave knew their place and nobody crossed the line. John had taught him that slaves were part of the family as much as the two of them, that they had personalities and feelings and weren't just something to be seen and not heard. They were people too.

Now that he was pregnant he saw it all the more, slowly he wound down the time he spent in the office and more at home, with John and with the slaves. Between them all they began preparing the nursery as well as preparing the house for the baby. He and John had discussed purchasing a 'nanny' from the markets to look after the baby for the first year or so but neither had been enthusiastic about it. 

"We have plenty of slaves," John said as they sat in the freshly painted nursery. "Between us all I think we'll manage."

"But none of us have an idea of bringing up a baby," Nick replied with a frown.

John laughed and reached out to him, resting a hand on his knee. "Very few people do. We'll figure it out together."

Eventually Nick left the office to begin his paternity leave and John was the one still working part time. He missed him when he was gone and tried to fill his time in reading books on the basics of child rearing. Sometimes it was frustrating, his entire personality had seemed to change, he felt less independent these days and clingy, often pining for John to come home. On evenings he'd lay out on the sofa, propped up against John and feeling all the more complete for having him back after an empty days alone.

"You aren't alone," John reminded him as he lamented on his long days. "This house is filled with people."

Instead of replying those people were all slaves, Nick took the words to heart and began engaging his slaves more and more everyday with conversation and activities. It was in those last months with little to do but waddle around and think about how the baby would be with them in a few weeks, that he really began getting to know Laka.

Nick had always been very careful about how close and friendly he was with Laka. Laka was 'John's slave', at least that was always how he thought about him. If he was honest enough with himself, he knew he carried a small amount of jealousy against the slave. In the early days of getting to know John, dating him and trying to have a relationship, it hadn't taken him long to realize and understand there was a closeness and yes, even he had to admit, love, between the two men. Everything he'd been taught, everything he stood for and believed in was against the idea, a man and a slave in love. Sleep with them yes, fuck them of course, but a relationship, encouraging a slave to believe in love, it was beyond understanding. To some extent he'd even thought of it as cruel. 

Laka was young, naive and it was dangerous of John to allow him to think and feel the way he'd been encouraged. It had felt like some sort of victory when John had promised him nothing more would happen between himself and Laka, that it was over. It couldn't have been any other way. Any attempt at persuading John to sell him on had been rebuffed so Nick had dropped the subject. He hadn't ever been cruel to the slave, had made sure he understood his place as much as he showed any slave. Secretly he'd had hopes that marriage would make John sell him on, but even that had backfired. John had even had a clause written into the marriage agreement that Laka would remain his slave and that even Nick's powers as Head of the Household couldn't remove him without his consent.

So Laka had remained with them and Nick knew he could hold no resentment to the younger man. He couldn't question John's loyalties or love, even though it was evident Laka still loved John despite the fact he was unattainable. In the months of his pregnancy as he spent more time in his home and around the slaves, Nick came to understand just how much Laka loved his husband. Nick wondered if it hurt to love a person who'd removed their love and affections and gave them to another yet still remain in the presence of that person. He came to realize he had nothing to be jealous of. John showed mild affection to Laka as he did the rest of the slaves. Laka received no special treatment, he was scolded and rebuked same as the others or laughed with and encouraged in the same way.

Yet there were times Nick watched Laka when John spoke or did something, even merely entering a room. There would be a look in his eyes or change in his stance, small glimpses of the love buried deep inside that weren't reciprocated nor answered. Instead of feeling victory, Nick found he could relate in a way. After all, he loved John also and the idea of being in love with John and not being able to have him was painful to even imagine. Nick learned to appreciate Laka's loyalty to his husband and the man he was for being strong in the face of such unfair circumstances.

"I was thinking maybe, when the baby is born, Laka could take on a bulk of the responsibilites," Nick said one evening as they lay in bed.

John gave a small frown and looked over at him from where he sat, propped up against the headrest with pillows as he read his book.

"What do you mean?" He asked, curious as to his husbands thoughts.

"It's all well and good saying we'll all take care of the baby," Nick continued, un-moving where he lay on his side, baby bump propped against a pillow. "Only the house will still need to be run, the slaves will still have their daily chores. Eventually we'll go back to our jobs. We should choose one of them to be the 'nanny' of sorts and I think that should be Laka."

"Okay, why?" John questioned again, setting his book as aside and turning to face him fully, sliding down the sheets so Nick couldn't avoid his eyes.

"I just said," Nick tried but John shook his head with a reproachful look.

"I mean why Laka?" John pointed out.

"You know why," Nick smiled, reaching out and resting a hand on John's face.

"I do?" John asked, moving closer.

"He's a good man, a good slave. He's gentle and honest and loyal, plus," Nick paused and stroked his fingers over his husbands face. "I think he'll love our baby as much as we will."

"All the slaves will love the baby," John pointed out quietly.

"Not like Laka," Nick told him. "We may not treat him differently to the others, but he's special."

"Nick, baby," John said, looking uncomfortable. They'd spoken little of his relationship with Laka before Nick had come into his life.

"Sweetheart," Nick assured him, pulling him closer. "I'm just saying I want our baby to have the best and I want Laka to be part of his or her life. I've been getting him to read the books we have on parenting. I think he'll be great in the role."

"You sure?" John asked, still frowning, like he was looking for a catch.

"Yes, I'm sure."


	7. Chapter 7

“Shit- fuck – I'm never doing this again,” Nick groaned out angrily as John helplessly held his hand. Nick had been in labor for a few hours and they were on the way to the hospital where they were being expected by their team.

“Everything is going to be okay baby,” John soothed, squeezing his fingers as the pain subsided and Nick drew in a heavy breath.

“Okay – fucking okay? When you've been through what I've been through the last nine months, and start feeling how I'm fucking feeling right now, then you can say everything is going to be okay, okay John!” Nick snapped back, groaning again. “Never, never again. God it's like he's trying to crawl out of me.”

“We're nearly there,” John assured him, ignoring his husbands snappiness. Nick had a short fuse at the best of times, it wasn't surprising he was in such a bad mood as labour pains wracked his body.

The car pulled up to the private clinic and a porter appeared out of the door with a wheelchair. John clambered out of the car and rushed around to Nick's door as he got out also. Nick scowled at the wheelchair in disgust. 

“I'm fucking giving birth,” He growled out, “I haven't lost the use of my legs.”

Grimacing he bent a little and clutched onto John's arm. 

“Just sit down Nicholas,” John ordered, guiding him into the wheelchair and slamming the car door shut. He bent down to the drivers window quickly. “You can go home, I'll call when I have news.”

He turned to find Nicholas already being ushered inside and followed quickly. The next few minutes were a blur as the team got Nick organised and settled in, John got to work signing some papers and eventually found his husband much calmer and no longer in pain as he was prepared for the c-section he was there to receive.

“The doctor and your team are just making some final prep, then we can take you in,” A nurse informed them with a friendly smile.

“Thanks,” John said with a nod, turning back to Nick and brushing a hand over his forehead. “Last few moments of just us. Soon there'll be three of us.”

Nick smiled at the thought, fingers snagging in his shirt. “I know, crazy right? As long as everything goes okay.”

“Don't be nervous, this team the best remember,” John said, giving him a quick kiss. 

“They better be for what we're paying them,” Nick joked but his smile turned nervous again. “We'll be fine, won't we?”

“Yes, everything will be fine,” John promised, nodding. “They're going to deliver the baby, put you back together good as new. In a couple of days I'll take you and our baby home and we'll be a family. We got a lot of years ahead of us to screw up remember, together husband of mine. I'm not doing this alone.”

“I love you,” Nick said softly, pulling him close.

“I love you too,” John said before kissing him.


	8. Chapter 8

“It's a boy,” John said over the phone, grinning. He couldn't stop smiling and there was a deep seated pride that wouldn't stop welling inside of him, like water overflowing a bucket. “He's perfect, just perfect. And Nick is great, everything went as planned, textbook delivery. The doctor said if his recovery goes as expected he can come home in a few days.”

“Congratulations John,” Laka replied calmly. “Everything is fine here, we're getting everything ready but it'll be all complete by the time you come home.”

“Good, that's good,” John said, only half listening. “Look I should go, but you know how to get in touch if you need too.”

“Yes of course,” Laka said. “Give our love to Master Nick.”

“I will, yeah,” John nodded. “Bye Laka.” 

He disconnected before Laka could say goodbye, rushing back to the private room Nick was recovering in.

“How is everything at home?” Nick asked as John came to his bedside.

“Fine, fine,” John said with a nod. “Laka says they're getting everything prepared for us coming home.”

“Did you tell him all about the baby?” Nick said as John sat beside him.

“Yeah of course,” John nodded again.

Nick gave a small laugh and shook his head at him, “John, you were barely out there five minutes, you couldn't have said much.”

“What is there to say?” John smiled. “Aside from he's perfect, that you're both doing well. Everything is fine at home and we'll be hopefully back in a few days.”

“Didn't Laka have any questions?” Nick asked him.

“It's Laka,” John pointed out to him. “He was his usual, cool, calm and collected self.”

“Well of course he was, it's a baby, he probably didn't know what to ask,” Nick pointed out. “Aside from what we called him.”

John gave a startled look and glanced away sheepishly.

“You didn't tell him what we named our son?” Nick asked in surprise, giving a small laugh. 

“I – no, I didn't,” John said with a small shake of his head. “I'll call him later.”

“I'll call,” Nick laughed again. “Maybe I'll make more sense.”


	9. Chapter 9

When the car drew up to the house, Nick couldn't help but smile at the welcome. Everyone had gathered on the porch steps, most holding small gifts, the awning had been decorated with blue ribbons and bunting. They all looked eager to meet the new addition to the household as well as relieved to have them home. It was nice to be welcomed so warmly and as he stepped out of the car everyone swarmed forward, offering hellos and even hugs. Nick was glad he'd taken advantage of the final months of pregnancy and taken the time to connect with his slaves. He was beginning to understand the idea of ohana John had always felt a household should be. 

They all took tentative steps back when John walked around the car with their son cradled in his arms. Nick beamed, he'd worried for months about being a parent, about being out of his depth. Now all he felt was pride and a deep sense of love and attachment to the small being they'd created as well as his husband. John, who accepted all his faults and failings and had been a positive impact in his life, this thinking and outlook. John was the best thing that had ever happened to him and he vowed never to forget that fact.

“Everyone,” John smiled broadly as they gathered in a small semi circle around them. “I'd like you to meet our son, Daniel.”

He grinned and turned a little so everyone could take a peek. Baby Daniel blinked in the sunlight but didn't make a sound, quite at peace in his dads arms.

“Daniel, I'd like you to meet the rest of your ohana.”

~ fin ~


End file.
